


Spider on the Wall

by Qion



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/F, Hurt No Comfort, Loneliness, References to Depression, but its japan so you already know its all downplayed, i got hit with the big sad so here's a thing about the Isolated Asian Housewife Experience, it's vent time y'all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:14:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24152635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Qion/pseuds/Qion
Summary: It gets lonely, waiting to eat a meal set for two, but Japan would never admit that to Greece, not with the heavy workload that's been piling onto her exhausted lover. But still, she knows how to give support when it's needed.She knows how to keep herself quiet when things fall apart.
Relationships: Female Greece/Female Japan (Hetalia), Greece/Japan (Hetalia)
Kudos: 17





	Spider on the Wall

**Author's Note:**

> Translations:  
> Okaeri - Welcome home  
> Hai - Yes  
> Oyasumi - Sleep well

Japan was used to the quiet. 

The doors leading to the garden were easily opened, allowing the tranquil night air to slowly seep through the spacious rooms and settle over the house in a soothing call to rest after a long day. With the world just outside, the hushed chirps of the crickets hidden in the grass and the brush of the wind through the leaves were easily blended together in a muted melody that Japan could enjoy from just about any room she desired.

But for now, she quietly opened the door to the dining room, sliding the shoji screen with careful fingers only to find the same sight that she had been staring at since the night had first fallen. 

The table was still set for two, bowls and plates left untouched from when she had first arranged them. The miso soup and rice had long since cooled, _tonkatsu_ left in sliced strips on each of the plates. She had left the cups empty though, tea still warm in the pot on the stove and ready to be served with the meal once the time came. 

Japan looked over the abandoned scene once before she made her way over to the other side of the table, gently straightening the chopsticks resting on the muted black holder, the color having faded with time. 

Her hand skidded when she heard the door open though, knocking over the chopsticks as her head whipped up. She made to straighten back up, but hastily reached back down to adjust them one final time before she hurried out of the room, throwing the shoji door open in her haste. 

She could hear the heavy thud of boots being tossed into the entryway, breaking through the calm of the night in a way that she had come to look forward to. It only took a second before Japan was at the doorway, standing on the wooden boards that bordered the tatami and struggling to catch her breath. 

“ _Okaeri_.” Japan bowed her head, taking the brief moment to hide her flushed face and regain her self-control. “I am glad that you have made it back safely.” 

A low hum was her only response before the boards creaked with slow footsteps that stopped in front of her. “You don’t need to be that formal.” 

When she raised her head again, Japan was met with Greece’s tired gaze, exhaustion seeming to bear itself down on her shoulders with each passing second. Her tan jacket was rumpled and nearly falling down her arms, short brown hair tangled in an untamed mess on top of her head. Greece’s posture was slouched, gradually getting worse as dark green eyes slowly fell shut before they managed to open again. 

Everything about her struck a deep chord of worry within Japan’s chest. 

“I apologize,” she said quietly, “I will remember next time.” 

Greece huffed out a laugh, the sound hushed but still familiar enough to bring about a quiet reverence in Japan. “Don’t worry about it.” 

A muffled yawn stretched out her final words and that was enough to snap Japan back into action. 

“Ah, please, come in!” Japan hurried out of the way to let Greece onto the tatami, bowing her head once more for good measure. “You must be tired after such a long week.” 

“It’s nothing new,” Greece replied easily, slowly ambling past her. “I just need a nap.” 

Japan paused, taking a deep breath before she spoke.

“I-” 

She stopped herself when Greece turned to look at her, peeking over her shoulder patiently until Japan could find the right words. She already knew her answer before she even asked the question, but there was still a small part of her that held onto the hope that maybe tonight would be the night that answer would change. 

“I made dinner, if you are hungry. It’s a little more than usual, but I thought you might like something heavier.” 

But Japan caught the hesitation that flickered across Greece’s face and she already knew it would be no different.

Greece opened her mouth once before she shut it again, glancing off to the side before she looked back at Japan. “I have work tomorrow, and it’s already late.” 

Japan caught the hidden request in her words, although that little act of perception did nothing to stop her shoulders from slumping. 

“It’ll lighten up soon,” Greece was quick to promise. “My boss just needs me right now. I’ll probably have a better schedule next week.”

“I understand.” She should have stopped there, should have kept her mouth shut and nodded along, but the doubts that piled up for so long slowly crept out before she could stop them. “You have been working late for a while now, though.”

Greece frowned, slowly making her way back to stand in front of Japan. “It’s not that bad.” 

“That does not mean it is good.” Japan couldn’t even bring herself to meet Greece’s eyes, keeping her gaze fixed on the crinkled lapel of her jacket instead. “I can help, if you would like me to. There is not much left for me to do these days.” 

“You don’t have to.” 

“But-” 

“No.” 

Japan silenced herself when Greece’s voice hardened, freezing in place for a moment before she finally spoke again. 

“But you’re always gone now.”

Greece let out a weary sigh, the firm set to her face fading away. “I know.”

She leaned down, hand slowly coming up to brush Japan’s bangs out of the way in order to press a small kiss to her forehead. 

“I can handle this on my own. I just need a little more time.” Her fingers carded through short raven locks in an attempt to straighten them out again. “You deserve a break, anyways.”

There were so many thoughts running through Japan’s head that she could barely keep track of them all, lost in her own hazy mind as Greece straightened up. Worries and solutions and pleas all melted together into a mess of scrambled words and meaningless phrases. 

_You deserve one too, are you still eating, please go to sleep, I don’t want a break like this, I’ll talk to your boss, I’ll fix it for you, I’ll help you, I miss you-_

“I see.”

But Japan would never let those thoughts see the light of day. 

“I didn’t mean to keep you for so long.” She motioned towards the shoji door with a gentle hand. “Please, rest. I’ve set up the futon already.” 

Greece still didn’t seem convinced, pausing with a frown that held no hidden amount of suspicion. “Are you sure?” 

“ _Hai_.” Japan easily put a smile on her face, the kind she used to receive from Greece when she wasn't so tired. “I will join you later. There are just some things I need to clean up first.” 

If this had happened before, she knew that Greece would have stubbornly stayed in place to argue until she conceded and went to bed with her. But now, when her workload was skyrocketing and her energy was being drained faster than ever, all she did was nod slowly and trod down the hall.

“Don’t stay up too late.” 

“I won’t. _Oyasumi._ ” 

Japan waited until Greece’s slouched form vanished, the screen closing behind her back and plucking her from sight. She stayed in the entrance for a moment longer as the silence returned, the quiet deafening once Greece left. 

Japan couldn’t stay there any longer, making her way back past the dining room into the kitchen. Plastic containers were pulled out from the cabinets and Japan had to pause when she saw the limited number left. There had to have been more than that, she could have sworn there were more.

She chose to close the cabinet. 

The miso soup was poured away and sealed with care, the _tonkatsu_ packaged and rice wrapped up into tidy squares. For a moment, Japan briefly wondered if she should start leaving her meals on the stove instead, where she wouldn’t have to bother with unused plates that she would have to wash later. 

That thought was quickly cast aside as she shook her head and hefted up the containers. Greece deserved better than that. 

Japan had never noticed how quiet her own footsteps were until it was all she had to listen to, socks falling against the tatami with muted landings. It was nothing like the heavier footsteps she had come to expect, if only because they brought some kind of sound to her home. 

She opened the door to the refrigerator, briefly checking over the food in her arms before she glanced up at the shelves. 

The containers hit the floor with barely more than a thud. 

Japan slapped a hand over her mouth to muffle her heaving breaths, sinking to her knees in the harsh artificial light. Her eyes stung with tears, barely kept together as her steady breathing was shaken with hiccups and sharp inhales. 

It was just food. Nothing more. It shouldn’t have mattered. It was just food.

Food kept in plastic containers and packed into the refrigerator, night after night of uneaten meals tucked away. Food left untouched, reheated in the morning for a solitary breakfast. Food made for two, but only acknowledged by one.

Japan squeezed her eyes shut, nails digging into her cheek in a desperate attempt to keep her volume under control. It was pathetic, how something as simple as seeing her own cooking could break her so easily. She wanted to scream, to cry, to wail and throw all of those containers out, to make enough noise so that Greece would come running after all of the nights when she had gone to bed alone. 

She wanted to shatter the silence that had poisoned her home, suffocating her with each cycle of the sun and moon until she thought she would drown in the quiet that never dissolved away. 

Japan had never despised the quiet as much as she did now.

Silence was a thing not to be broken once it was enforced though, and she knew this better than anybody else. 

Japan kept her voice hushed as she sobbed on the kitchen floor, the door left open so she could face the result of her labor. The containers at her knees were left abandoned in favor of the piles that rested in the refrigerator. 

It took practice, but Japan managed to restrict herself to small gasps that had her chest heaving with each small intake of air until she became no louder than the distant chirping of the crickets or the rush of the wind that wisped through the open door.

She didn’t dare to disturb the quiet. Greece deserved to sleep well, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> yup yup some stuff happened and i had to take it all out on japan, poor thing. she deserves so much more than what i'm giving her. i shouldn't even have written this bc i have a wip i need to work on, but here we are anyways
> 
> also forgot again, but feel free to come talk to me on [tumblr](https://qionow.tumblr.com/)


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